~ Milica Puric ~
Violeta Sakovic, a motivational speaker, professor and popular influencer from New York, recently published her first book ‘With confidence in life’. In the book, Violeta talks about life, love, parenting, overcoming fears, children upbringing, marriage… Her readers are delighted with every topic she was observing in the book, but the theme of marriage and wedding vows has caused a lot of controversies.
Urban Culture Tribe: Unlike most of the girls who are looking forward to saying ‘Until death do us part’ at their weddings, you have a little different, maybe controversial opinion about the wedding vow. It seems that you don’t believe in it. Why is that?
Violeta Sakovic: I deeply believe that the wedding vow ‘Until death do us part’ is the silent killer of many marriages. This vow should be formulated into something more inspiring, creative, meaningful and beautiful. Something that will make spouses flourish when they are with each other, not make them old because of each other. Though guided by the fact that they will spend their whole life together, many partners often become distant, detached and stop being dedicated to their marriage and their partners. Marriage is a wonderful community if it is made between compatible partners who love each other and who are willing to put time and effort to live in a happy and harmonious community. However, after the wedding vows, many people start taking their partners and marriage for granted.
Several years ago, Violeta came to New York from Serbia, a country burdened with many difficulties and serious struggles. Coming from the small town and different environment, she suddenly found herself in the center of a not the new world. Like many immigrants, she started working as a nanny, even she had a Bachelor’s degree in teaching.
The cover of Violeta’s new book
She was amazed by the new world and she began sharing her experiences on social networks. Every day she published new stories, recorded new videos, wrote new posts… She was far away from her family and friends, and that was hard, but she kept her joy and positive attitude.
Urban Culture Tribe: It seems that you always have an optimistic approach towards life, compassion for people and readiness to encourage everyone to live a better life, regardless of age, sex, social and financial status. This attracts people to you. You also have thousands of followers on social media Facebook, Youtube, Instagram – violeta_sakovic_369. They gave you a name Fairy. How did you achieve all these things?
Violeta Sakovic: Activity is my middle name. We can’t achieve anything in life without action and activity. For my readers on social media, I want to be an example of someone who achieved goals by properly organizing my time, internal fire, willingness, activity, and dedication. I love inspiring, encouraging and educating people. It makes me happy to make other people happy. Thanks to the feedback that I am receiving all the time, I know that all my efforts, work, and dedication make sense and that they are having a positive effect on other people and their lives. That inspires me and gives me proof that I’m on the right track. Therefore, I do not want to stop. On the contrary.
Urban Culture Tribe: You also mentioned that your followers on social networks gave you the idea to write this book.
Violeta Sakovic: That is true! I am a visionary by nature and someone who dreams big dreams, but the idea of writing a book never came to my mind, until a couple of years ago when my Facebook friends started asking me about it. I can say that they are the initiators of the idea of the book, not me, and I am very thankful to them because this book brought me enormous joy and liberation”.
Through writing, I opened my soul to people who understood me, encouraged me, supported me, sympathized with me and found themselves in my story. Writing gave me freedom. That was medicine for me and stimulus for others to do the same because through that process I became released and reborn. As a teacher, I enjoy teaching people, forcing them to think and changing their harmful believes and behavior. My dream is to use myself, or better ‘to take advantage’ of myself, of my potentials, talents, and skills and touch the hearts of people all over the world. I want to inspire them to live their dreams and to help them heal their souls and live better lives.
Urban Culture Tribe: In your book and social media you direct your messages mostly to women. Why is that?
Violeta Sakovic: The truth is that I direct my messages mostly to women because, as a woman, I can understand them better and identify myself with them. The only thing that bothers me in male-female relationships is the underestimation of women. I do not like seeing depressed, sad women who are not aware of themselves, their qualities and values. I do not like when women are taken for granted. Unfortunately, many of us don’t have self-esteem and self-confidence. I would like to teach women how to have self-esteem and to be self-confident, because happy women make the world around them happy and, opposite, unhappy women make everything and everyone around them miserable.
Urban Culture Tribe: How did you feel when your book was finally published? Have you been scared, excited, curious?
Violeta Sakovic: My biggest fear was how my parents, family and closest friends were going to react to my book. They were my first readers and I didn’t want to disappoint them and their expectations. They read the book quickly and fortunately, they loved it! I didn’t want to disappoint my parents and I didn’t. They said I touched their hearts, I made them cry, I inspired them, I forced them to think about everything. I even changed the way they were thinking before and that was my goal. Soon after that, my readers started calling me, sending me messages and praising my work. Some of them even said that my book was some kind of amulet for them and that they liked having it in their hands. I am deeply moved by that, because, there is no better compliment for a writer than that.
There are many people who believe that I am a source of happiness, joy and positive energy and that everything that comes from me brings progress in their lives. These confessions touched my heart and made me cry. I know that everything we believe in becomes truth and I really believe that my book can bring improvement to readers.
Rafting in Poconis with friends Martha and Sanja
Urban Culture Tribe: You talk a lot about children and parenting. What are your most important messages to parents?
Violeta Sakovic: Children are my favorite creatures and all I want is to see that every child is happy. The way of upbringing children has incredible importance for the creation of their personalities. A child who suffers from beating, underestimation, and criticism, a child that adults constantly force to be silent and upon whom they direct their frustration will have low self-confidence. On the other hand, parents who raise their children with a lot of love, patience, encouragement, and support provide a solid base for the child’s further development and child’s self-esteem. The role of the parent is extremely important and not very easy. That’s why it is very important that people are mature, educated and capable of dominating themselves before they devote themselves to that role. As R. Fulghum said, “Do not worry that children never listen to you; worry that they are always watching you”. Children learn about life by copying their parents. That is why, I believe, it is more important to “educate” parents before they begin to raise children.
Urban Culture Tribe: What is your message for the Urban Culture Tribe’s readers?
Violeta Sakovic: I want to give my support, understanding, love, warmth, faith and hope to the people who needed it the most. In fact, in my book I invite people to join me to build a new, better world together. A world where we can love and honor ourselves and respect others. A world where we can accept diversity and where we can support, love, inspire and encourage each other. A world where we can live freely and be free. A world where everyone will be in peace with himself/herself, and therefore in peace with others. Keep in mind that the fortune favors the brave! Everything is possible and continue to prove that.
~ Milica Puric ~ ©